


Jojo Kills Santa

by PeepMeep



Series: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: The Santa Clause [1]
Category: Santa Clause (Movies), ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure
Genre: M/M, This is Bad, chrimbus, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-25
Updated: 2016-12-25
Packaged: 2018-09-12 00:00:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9045701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeepMeep/pseuds/PeepMeep
Summary: Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. Jotaro and Kakyoin were fast asleep in bed, having spent their Christmas break doing...well you're going to have to see now, won't you?





	

**Author's Note:**

> I watched The Santa Clause for the first time in forever and had a bad idea  
> I haven't written anything in forever  
> I apologize

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. Jotaro and Kakyoin were fast asleep in bed, having spent their Christmas break doing....well not much of anything. Neither of them really celebrated Christmas. Despite having an American mother, there wasn’t much point going through the trouble of getting a tree in Japan if his father wasn’t around.  
A sudden noise woke the two teens from their slumber. Star Platinum phased in next to the bed, muscles tensing, ready for battle.  
“Do you think it could be the work of an enemy stand?” Kakyoin whispered; he hadn’t called Hierophant Green out yet, favoring surprise and agility over brute force.  
Jotaro grunted a noncommittal answer. His head snapped up when there was the sound again, coming from above.  
“The roof.” The sound of footfalls was clear. Jotaro slipped out of bed; Kakyoin grabbed his arm.  
“You can’t think you’re going out there yourself, can you?” Jotaro didn’t respond, but he didn’t stop him from following, either.  
They cracked open the front door. There was a fresh layer of snow on the ground, hiding any potential footprints. Hierophant Green slithered around the doorframe and wound his way up the wall. Kakyoin jumped back in surprise.  
“Jotaro, you’re not going to believe who--”  
Before he could finish, Star Platinum shot up like a rocket, unleashing a flurry of punches on the intruder above. There was a great clatter as they tumbled down the roof, crashing into the snow below.  
Jotaro stood proud, knowing that the threat was vanquished. Kakyoin, on the other hand, was gesticulating wildly between the body and Jotaro.  
“Jojo, do you know what you’ve done?”  
“I--”  
“Jotaro, you’ve killed Santa!”  
He looked down to see what once was clearly a jolly old fat man dressed in red and white (and a couple new colors blooming under his skin as well). Star Platinum leaned in closer.  
“Ora?”  
Kakyoin placed on hand on Star Platinum’s shoulder. “It’s okay big guy, it’s not your fault. I bet Jotaro has never even told you about Santa Claus.” He kneeled down next to the body.  
“What….do you think you’re doing?” Something told him this wasn’t going to be so simple as just going back to sleep.  
“We’re going to have to finish delivering the presents,” Kakyoin said while getting Santa’s coat off, directing the two stands to help him.  
“No.” Jotaro turned around to walk back inside. “It would be impossible.”  
“You can stop time and you beat an immortal vampire. How is what Santa does any different? Here.” Kakyoin shoved the jacket into Jotaro’s arms.  
They found a ladder in the garage to get up to the roof. There was Santa’s fabled sleigh, with eight reindeer prancing nervously. Star Platinum phased in, looking quizzically at the scene. Fighting stands of all shapes and forms were no surprise to him. But CHristmas was something entirely new to him.  
He floated over to the back of the sleigh, settling in next to the sack of the presents. “Ora!”  
Jotaro and Kakyoin settled into the front of the sleigh. “You know,” Kakyoin pointed out, “you look pretty good in that coat.”  
Jotaro pulled the brim of his hat over his eyes. “Yare yare daze.” He snapped the reins and the reindeer took off into the sky.


End file.
